


Weakness

by Rainy212



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Because I have way too much in common with Mikan, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, kinda just me projecting my past self onto Mikan, mainly just hurt im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-20
Updated: 2019-05-20
Packaged: 2020-03-08 19:52:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18901507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainy212/pseuds/Rainy212
Summary: “No one deserves to be treated like that!”Well then, Mikan guessed she was no one.





	Weakness

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written fanfiction in forever since I'm just recovering from depression so I hope I don't fuck it up. 
> 
> Also somewhat inspired by akapolarbear's Byakuya fics and other good angst.

Mikan didn’t understand what she was doing wrong. 

When she first enrolled in Hope’s Peak she saw it as her way out, her escape. She would be free of the bullies, of her parents, of everyone who tormented her. Yet, it wasn’t enough. She was still alone. 

And in her mind she was doing everything right. She wasn’t cruel, she was accommodating, she tried to make them all happy but she could tell they didn’t truly like her, they just pitied her. 

At least Hiyoko was honest, she didn’t like Mikan but at least she would say it, and air out her grievances rather than hide them behind dark eyes and fake smiles. She never even minded what Hiyoko said about her, as much as she should have been angry she was just glad she could make the other girl happy, even if making her happy meant she would have to be insulted. That was the least she could do. 

She just wanted to make people happy, no matter the cost. But then, why weren’t they ever satisfied? She was doing everything right. She didn’t talk when she wasn’t being spoken to. She exposed herself and humiliated herself for their enjoyment. She would stay up all night, losing precious hours of sleep, if someone was sick just to watch over them, no matter how minor their ailment. She wasn’t the one who mattered, they did. 

So why weren’t they satisfied? 

It was a mystery Mikan would never know the answer to.  
________________________

It was a normal day after classes, everyone was gathering up their belongings and slowly shuffling out of the room. For Mikan this just meant she would go to the nurses office and stay there until nightfall. She was the Ultimate Nurse after all, it was her duty after all. Mikan was unsure if there was a nurse at Hope’s Peak before she arrived at the school, there was a timesheet as if there was but whoever it was never seemed to show up. Mikan would swipe the card in and out anyway, it was the least she could do. 

She was about to pick up her bag when she heard someone speak behind her. 

“Tsumiki.” She turned around to see the voice belonged to Peko, although she hadn’t had the slightest idea why Peko was suddenly talking to her. 

“Y-yes Pekoyama-san?” 

“Do you mind if I ask you something?” The girl spoke, her tone as flat as it normally was. 

“W-what is it?”  
“Why do you let Hiyoko walk all over you? Actually, now that I’m thinking about it, why do you let everyone take advantage of you?” 

The question took Mikan aback. What did she mean? She didn’t let everyone walk all over her, at least she didn’t think she did. And even if she did, why would it matter to her? 

“I-I-I-” Mikan tried to respond but the words wouldn’t come out her mouth. How should she respond anyway? 

“I’m not sure what I expected” Peko finally spoke again after a couple of seconds had passed. “You really are weak, aren’t you?” 

Weak. 

Mikan had heard every name in the book. Pathetic, weak, useless, disgusting; she was familiar with them all. But weak was a word that always seemed to affect her, just a little bit, every time it was said. And the way Peko spoke was with so much malice, was she mad at her for being weak? 

“Peko! That’s enough.” Another voice brought Mikan out of her thoughts. She turned to see Mahiru glaring at Peko, Mikan assumed she had left but it seems she had overheard their conversation. 

“I was already finished.” Peko replied. She turned around only to speak again. 

“Besides, I thought it was something we were all wondering.” The girl started to walk away, over towards the door where Fuyuhiko was waiting. 

“What was that about?” Mahiru addressed her. “Jeez. She doesn’t just get to be rude like that. Aren’t I right Tsumiki-san?” 

“I-I don’t mind.” Mikan responded. 

“Well you should.” Mahiru nodded and crossed her arms. “No one deserves to be treated that way.” 

No one? Well then Mikan guessed she was no one.  
________________________

A couple days later Mikan was approached by Fuyuhiko. 

“Hey uh- Tsumiki.” He addressed her. “I want to apologize for what Peko said, it wasn’t right of her to -”  
“Why?” Mikan cut him off. 

“Why?” Fuyuhiko was taken aback. 

“Yes, why?” 

“Well…” Fuyuhiko rubbed his hand against the back of his neck. “It was rude of her to say that to you and-” 

“I don’t mind.” Mikan cut him off again. 

“Well you should!” Fuyuhiko retorted. “No one deserves to be treated like that!” 

Well then, Mikan guessed she was no one.  
________________________

A couple days later she was approached by Peko again. 

“Hey Tsumiki, I heard from Fuyuhiko that his apology didn’t go so well so I’m here to apologize for-” 

“It’s fine.” Mikan told her. 

“But why is it fine?” Peko asked in response. 

“Why shouldn’t it be?” It seemed that Mikan’s stutter only went away when she wanted to depreciate herself. 

Peko was somewhat alarmed, when Fuyuhiko said his apology didn’t go well she didn’t bother to ask why, now she was beginning to understand. 

“What do you mean?” She inquired the other girl. “I asked you an insulting question, why aren’t you insulted?” 

“W-well… I was a little insulted but I don’t really care about what people say to me.” Mikan admitted. 

“What do you mean you don’t care.” 

“I-I don’t really mind what people say about me, as long as it makes them happy.”

“Makes them happy?” Peko’s concern continued to grow. 

“Yes.” Mikan responded. “If I have to be hurt to make someone else happy then so be it.”

A flash of recognition flew across Peko’s face. Her words reminded her of her own once, back before she started attending Hope’s Peak. It was the same tone she used in her own mind when she tried to convince herself she was just a tool. But this, this was different. Peko may not have cared for herself but at least she cared about Fuyuhiko, but Mikan had nobody. She was doing this to herself for nobody. 

“Who are you trying to make happy?” Peko asked after a couple of seconds. 

“I- I don’t really know.” Mikan responded. “I guess everybody?” 

“Everyone?” 

“It doesn’t matter how much I get hurt if I can make others happy.” Mikan stated. “It’s all I’m good for.” 

“What?” 

“You know, you’re the first person to ask me why.” Mikan explained. “To me, at least. This is just the way things are. If I make people happy then they won’t hurt me. Even if I have to hurt myself, it's better to hurt myself than to let others hurt me.” 

Mikan continued “I’ve been hurt so many times before, by so many people, for so many reasons. I’m scared, frightened that if I screw up and upset someone that I’ll get hurt again. And so if I keep them happy I won’t upset them. Even if I humiliate myself, hurt myself, scar myself I don’t care as long as they don’t hurt me.” 

A small tear started to form in Mikan’s eye.

“Yet, at the same time, I hope that by keeping them happy someone will finally stop to care about me. But no one ever does, they just watch but never ask.”

The first tear fell, followed by many more. She began to cry. 

“But they don’t understand the fear and self hatred that fuels my every move. And I won’t stop, I refuse to stop. Do you think I don’t notice everyone’s stares, their whispers, their fake smiles.” 

Mikan wiped her face with her sleeves, trying to stop the tears. They refused.  
“I may please them, entertain them but it doesn’t mean anything to them. They don’t understand the work and effort I put in just to try and please everyone. And yet, if I stop I have no idea what will happen and I’m afraid of -.” 

Peko raised a finger to Mikan’s lips. 

“Stop.” And she hugged her.


End file.
